Asha taking her steps for the camera, while a jealous attention seeking puppy dog trys to steal the spotlight
Monday, May 28, 2007
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
work rant
The truth is that I am scared. I'm scared to do what in my heart I know is right. I am not happy in my job, but I have worked so long and so hard to get to this point. To say that I might be wrong, that I might have made a mistake is a scary proposition. To admit to everyone else that I went into the wrong specialty, the wrong career, or chose to work at the wrong hospital scares me.
Is it wrong to want to be ordinary?
Something happened after the birth of my daughter. I almost wish for the simple existence of a 9-5, Monday through Friday job rather than what I am doing right now. Sure people would trade places with me in an instant and the banality of a menial job would bring it's own set of problems.
Still the point is that I am getting paid $140,000 a year and I am frustrated and mentally beaten down after working at this God-forsaken hospital. You could pay me $500,000 and I would probably still feel the same way. At least it's not about the money then eh? I want to do the right thing, I want to be excellent and work in an environment where people actually care about doing the right thing, about being excellent in every way. I want to help patients get better but I am harassed by case managers or charge nurses about sending an ICU patient out to the floor because they want to save some money when I know what is going to happen when they get sent out to the room furthest from the nurses station. Fill out your forms. Call me for sleep, pain, or diet orders but don't call me about the patient's antibiotics or immunosuppressant medications.
A while back I admitted a patient for a deep venous thrombosis (DVT or blood clot for those unfamiliar with medical jargon) and treated him with heparin. Yet I was told to fill out a form detailing my method for prophylaxis or prevention of a DVT in a patient who was already diagnosed and being treated for a DVT. He has a DVT!!! He's on IV heparin!!! Arrggh, Senseless. Nurses car more about filling out forms, following policy, and providing the illusion of patient care then actually delivering patient care.
I was right about her when I sent her out the last time against my better judgement. I told you what was going to happen but you don't care. You were just following orders. Move the meat. Another day, another dollar. Worry about hiring more nurses or giving them less senseless forms to fill out and replace that with common sense and good
I feel underappreciated and used. I don't have an office. I don't even have a freaking business card. I am a stopgap measure, a hired gun, a mercenary, but yet here I am thrust into the void to do the work and clean up the mess while others I work with nurses and adminstrators that care more about senseless policy then actual patient care. No one wants to take responsibility. That's not my job.
Is it wrong to want to be ordinary?
Something happened after the birth of my daughter. I almost wish for the simple existence of a 9-5, Monday through Friday job rather than what I am doing right now. Sure people would trade places with me in an instant and the banality of a menial job would bring it's own set of problems.
Still the point is that I am getting paid $140,000 a year and I am frustrated and mentally beaten down after working at this God-forsaken hospital. You could pay me $500,000 and I would probably still feel the same way. At least it's not about the money then eh? I want to do the right thing, I want to be excellent and work in an environment where people actually care about doing the right thing, about being excellent in every way. I want to help patients get better but I am harassed by case managers or charge nurses about sending an ICU patient out to the floor because they want to save some money when I know what is going to happen when they get sent out to the room furthest from the nurses station. Fill out your forms. Call me for sleep, pain, or diet orders but don't call me about the patient's antibiotics or immunosuppressant medications.
A while back I admitted a patient for a deep venous thrombosis (DVT or blood clot for those unfamiliar with medical jargon) and treated him with heparin. Yet I was told to fill out a form detailing my method for prophylaxis or prevention of a DVT in a patient who was already diagnosed and being treated for a DVT. He has a DVT!!! He's on IV heparin!!! Arrggh, Senseless. Nurses car more about filling out forms, following policy, and providing the illusion of patient care then actually delivering patient care.
I was right about her when I sent her out the last time against my better judgement. I told you what was going to happen but you don't care. You were just following orders. Move the meat. Another day, another dollar. Worry about hiring more nurses or giving them less senseless forms to fill out and replace that with common sense and good
I feel underappreciated and used. I don't have an office. I don't even have a freaking business card. I am a stopgap measure, a hired gun, a mercenary, but yet here I am thrust into the void to do the work and clean up the mess while others I work with nurses and adminstrators that care more about senseless policy then actual patient care. No one wants to take responsibility. That's not my job.
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